When i worked underground in a coal mine, i pretty much refused to shít for the longest time.
I used to walk around needing to poop so bad that i would eventually get poop contractions. I would walk five steps and knurl over in pain, taking time to do my breaths so i could take five more steps. Once the contractions got within one or two steps then i knew it was time and there was absolutely no way i was holding on to this one until my shift was over....
This is how we came to have a black president. Sorry guys i just couldnt contain him...