Fleshlight customer service

[Beelzebubba]

meh it had potential....but wasn't all that funny.

I think I will try that when the next telemarketer calls:

they open there pitch, I listen patiently... then in my best Borat impersonation:
Ahh Yes, This Cuustomer Service? I accidently whole fleshlight.
They'll continue trying to sell whatever it is they are selling or get donations for. when they pause:
You have ever broken your pocket pussy? It is very....how you say...disappointing.

I can just run with this gag for awhile. Telemarketers will stay on the phone for a LONG ass time and just take it. I had a long discussion with several about how the Taco Bell Gordita and Chalupas aren't really gorditas or chalupas. All the while they kept trying to steer the conversation back to cheap term life insurance.

That's 30 minutes of entertainment for me and 30 minutes of lost productivity for him

 

[raz18]

Rofl!!!! Freakin Hilarious Man!!!!

 

[Civic11]

What is Cyber Ninja? Can someone school me on this...

 

[DirtyD]

bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?

BritneySpears14: Aight.

bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.

BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.

bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.

BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.

bloodninja: Me too baby.

BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.

bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.

BritneySpears14: Hey...

bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 Cock of the Infinite.

BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.

bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.

BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.

bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me b***h, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.

bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.

BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.

bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.

bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.

bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.

bloodninja: Baby?

-------------------

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.

j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.

bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.

j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.

j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.

bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.

j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.

j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.

j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.

bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.

j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.

bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.

j_gurli3: thats it.

bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.

bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.

--------------

BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?

eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.

BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.

eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.

BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.

BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.

eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.

BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.

eminemBNJA: Oh ****

BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.

eminemBNJA: Oh ****

eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

There's many many more, these are just a few of the best.

 

[Civic11]

There's many many more, these are just a few of the best.

Great stuff! I love how he did that RPG sex and the Rhinoceros? WTF! LOL!!

Very Funny

Which thread has this? I tried searching for Cyber Ninja and nothing came up...

Did you guys ever try cybering before? I remember when I was like 14 I found a chatroom and got this b***h to cyber. I f**ked with her for a while and made up a fake story how I was a firefighter bored at work, blah,blah... and then at the end I told her I had a confession to make and I was a 14 year old kid... SHE GOT SO PISSED AND RIPPED ME A NEW ONE.. Hilarious.

 

[Black Magic]

Some of those were actually pretty funny

...but I gotta say, isn't that a waste of time? seems to me like it would have taken a while.

 

[89SiGUYrex]

this s**t is too good, fleshlite and blood ninja haha.

 

[Civic11]

Some of those were actually pretty funny

...but I gotta say, isn't that a waste of time? seems to me like it would have taken a while.

yeah, that's what makes it so funny though IMO. I mean someone planned all that out and spent the time to do that.

What makes odd jokes so funny to me (Like some crazy Youtube videos) is that someone actually went through the time to make it happen. I always keep that in my head for online jokes/Youtube Videos/ etc...

 

[Black Magic]

Perhaps you're right ... the blood ninja is insanely funny, the fleshlight is good too, but just seems a bit more immature.

Not hating at all, just imo.

 

[Civic11]

Perhaps you're right ... the blood ninja is insanely funny, the fleshlight is good too, but just seems a bit more immature.

Not hating at all, just imo.

Yeah, It's easier to do; just go to the website and start a chat. Nothing to hard about that...

Cyber Ninja is hilarious because he actually got the chicks prepped and ready to cyber sex and then turns weird on their ass. The funny part of Cyber Ninja is watching the girls gradually go from hot and read to super-turned off